New Mercies Just for You: Overcoming Christian Shame and Inadequacy
New Mercies Just for You: Overcoming Christian Shame and Inadequacy
Even if you tried your best to be the perfect Christian, (there is no such thing, by the way) there would be times when you failed—because of your human nature.
Welcome to the 80th issue of The Aim and Soar Life, a weekly newsletter about faith, personal growth, and lifestyle that provides actionable, relatable, and biblically rooted content to help you live abundantly and GROW YOU. GOD’S WAY.
Greetings Friend!😍
Happy Sunday!
Lately, in my practice as a psychotherapist providing Christian counseling, I’ve been encountering Christian men and women who have been silently suffering from what I’ve dubbed the “Not Good Enough Syndrome.” This happens when people feel a deep sense of inadequacy or shame.
Sometimes we suffer shame from our past lives—the things we did before we came to Christ, other times, we suffer because we feel like we don’t measure up to what we feel God wants from us, or worse, we feel like we don’t measure up to other Christians.
This misguided thinking can hamper our relationship with Christ because it causes us to view God as a parent we can never please, causing us to be resentful and often preventing us from fully accepting God’s grace and mercy.
You Won’t Always Get It Right and That’s Okay
First, we need to know that even though God’s Word is the standard for our behavior and lifestyle as Christians, we won’t always meet the mark. Even if you tried your best to be the perfect Christian, (there is no such thing, by the way) there would be times when you failed—because of your human nature.
I’ve had times when I have started my day off with the Lord, sitting in His presence, feeling His love and care for me. In those moments and the time after, I am totally committed to allowing the Lord to use me however he wishes. Then suddenly, I allow something or someone to make me angry or take my joy away and I lash out in a way that doesn’t represent God. I am left feeling ashamed, terribly inadequate, and disappointed in myself.
What do you do in cases like this?
You repent and move forward. Correct your behavior as much as you can and ask the Holy Spirit to help you where you fall short.
God is concerned with the posture of your heart.
Now, this is not some cheap excuse to sin and “do you.” I’m talking about being fully committed to living the way God intends for you to live as outlined in His Word, but sometimes missing the mark.
In the Bible, King David is a prime example of someone who did many things wrong (adultery and murder to name a few) but whose heart was postured toward God.
22 After removing Saul, he made David their king. God testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.’
Acts 13:22, NIV
In fact, King David is the only person in Scripture whom God describes as a man after His own heart. How could this be since David did some terrible things in his lifetime?
I’ll tell you. David was repentant and his heart was right with God. We can fool others, but we can’t fool God. God can see the very depths of our hearts. He knows if we really love Him or if we are just giving lip service.
When David messed up, he was quick to confess it to God. He recognized that when He sinned, He offended the One who matters most—God.
When we fall short, it’s God we need to come to.
I challenge you to read what I call David’s love letter to the Lord in Psalm 51, which he wrote in response to being confronted by Nathan the Prophet about his sin of having an adulterous relationship with Bathsheba and being responsible for the murder of her husband Uriah.
What you will find in Psalm 51 is a man who is broken by his sin, and thus confesses it to God and asks for forgiveness, understanding that God still loves us even in our mess-ups.
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9, NKJV
When you understand that God is a loving Father who is always poised to forgive you because He wants you to get it right and will help you to get it right, you will not be hampered by feelings of inadequacy.
When you understand that God is a loving Father who is always poised to forgive you because He wants you to get it right and will help you to get it right, you will not be hampered by feelings of inadequacy.
The Past is the Past
“The only person who holds your past against you and accuses you is Satan.”
I’ve said this so many times to people I’ve counseled in therapy, as well as friends and family members who feel that God is holding their past against them, and therefore, the challenges they experience in their lives are a result of God’s punishment for the things they did in their pasts.
This simply isn’t true.
When we confess our sins and ask for forgiveness, God is not walking around with a checklist writing things down against us.
He is not punishing you for something you did in your past.
This doesn’t mean we won’t experience consequences for our behavior. For example, if a wife cheats on her husband and the husband decides to divorce her, God is not punishing the wife for her sin of adultery. The wife is experiencing consequences for her actions. However, God will forgive her and restore her to a right relationship with Him if she is truly repentant.
That goes for all of us. What’s done is done. No matter how horrific your sin may have been, if you confessed it to God, repented, and asked for forgiveness, it’s a done deal. Your sin is wiped away.
12 For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins[a]and their lawless deeds I will remember no more.”
Hebrews 8:12
The one thing that I love about God is that He gives us new mercy every day! Why do you think He does that?
He gives it because we need it!
In His infinite knowledge, the Father looks at us and knows everything about us. He knows when we will fail. He knows when we will backslide, go down the wrong roads, and turn our lives into complete chaos.
He knows you. There is no need for shame because God has wiped your past clean. There is no need to feel inadequate because Jesus is all you need to meet God’s standards.
We serve a God who lives in each one of us who has confessed and accepted Christ. He is right there with you, guiding you.
You are loved by the Almighty God of the universe, there is no room for feelings of shame and inadequacy in that love.
22 Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
23 They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.Lamentations 3:22-23, NKJV
Peace and Love.❤️
Until Next Time,
GROW YOU. GOD’S WAY.
Sherrhonda 😍
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